Don't be hatin'

I was at work one morning, conversing with one of the nurses. She's pregnant.

I wasn't sure how far along she was, but she didn't look very big.

She was sitting at her computer, inputting her assessments. Only she was having to stop every few minutes or so.

She was having contractions! We talked a bit more, turns out she was 3 days from 40 weeks. With her first. She'd had irregular contractions the night before, and her last office visit the day before had shown she was 2cm and 100% effaced.

But she came into work. It being her first, she didn't think she was in labor. She was planning to go natural, prepared to go overdue, have a long labor etc.

Only at work her contractions were regular. When I was talking with her they were 4 minutes apart. She said they were painful but she was calm and breathing through them. She was working on getting her paperwork complete because she felt she wasn't going to finish her 12 hour shift (it was about 11am).

I was telling her she was doing good by keeping busy and keeping her mind off it. It could still be awhile, it's going to get much worse (although I always include that everyone is different and feels different sensations as they labor), early labor is easy etc etc.

Well about 45 minutes later she was getting a bit more serious looking. She handed over her patients and went to Labor and Delivery.

I don't know all the details from there. Only that we checked on her about 1-2 hours later and per her family she was 7 cm and said to tell us that she was "dying".

She had her just shy of 7 lb baby at about 2pm. After a 4-6 hour labor, 3 of which she worked through.

I told my husband that when she came back from maternity leave I was going to punch her.

He told me not to hate just because she had the labor and delivery I wanted.

Even my midwife would tell you that she and anyone like her are an exception to the rule.

 But I still begrudge her a little. 

Parenting is the start of second guessing

I guess I've lost a little of my enthusiasm for blogging. I have more enthusiasm for "real" life these days. That's not so bad really.

But tonight I was talking to a friend of mine who's sister just had a baby. Her sister was induced at 41ish weeks. The baby didn't tolerate the induction very well and she had to have a c-section. My friend was saying she's sure her sister has some "mommy-guilt" about being induced and that leading to the surgery. I told her parenting is the beginning of a lifelong journey of "what-ifs".

What if I wouldn't have been induced?
What if I would've tried harder to breast feed?
What if something's really wrong and I'm just letting him/her scream?
What if he has a food allergy reaction?
What if I picked the wrong daycare?
What if vaccines give him/her problems?
What if they aren't eating enough?
What if they're eating too much?
What if the food isn't enough variety?
What if I hold them too much?
What if I don't hold them enough?
What if they're a bully?
What if they're too shy?
What if they aren't developing quick enough?
What if they have an ear infection?
What if it's something really serious?
What if they do poorly in school?
What if I'm a bad example?
What if I lose my temper?
What if I'm too lenient?
What if they break my heart?
What if they're irresponsible?
What if I can't give them all I want to?
What if I could have done better?

For me at least, those first few months of parenting are filled with SO MANY QUESTIONS. And that's coming from a maternity nurse! There are soooo many decisions to be made, and lots of them don't have clear cut answers. And you'll hear so many different suggestions for the same problem. And they all have worked for someone. But you have to figure out what works for YOU! and YOUR baby!

That's the thing. In Christ He equips us to be the parents our kids need. But it is such a monumental task. We all do the best we can. Some days your best is just getting by, spending the day in jammies, no bath and eating takeout. Some days you'll have it together and get out for a walk, go to the park, do a craft, clean the house and make dinner (at least I hear some moms can do all that in one day!).
A lot of times you have to just take in the options then go with your gut.

For instance even just now. Sophia is starting to get a cold. She's congested. I made sure she had some Tylenol, a bath, a nice full belly and warm PJ's. She went to bed fine, but woke up an hour later. John put the humidifier in her room. I aspirated her nose, checked for fever, gave her a bottle, some Hyland's teething tablets (she's still not fully cut her top molars) and the other half of the bottle she didn't finish at bedtime. She finally quieted down as I was rocking her. Then after a few minutes she decided she wanted to get up and walk around the room and be awake and play. I tried to get her to cuddle and rock again. Nope.

So I decided to just put her in her crib. Poor thing, I felt she wasn't going to sleep at all unless she was just totally exhausted. And I'm going to have to be up with her tonight so I want some rest too. I know it was miserable for her, but I just let her cry. She cried about 30 minutes. In the moment of hearing it it feels like forever. But now she is quiet.

She hasn't been consistently sleeping through the night for about 3 months. Some nights she does, but that's becoming the exception and not the rule. To be honest, I can get up once maybe even twice a night and it doesn't even phase me. But getting up 3 and 4 times a night is tiring for sure. It's just seemed like every time I'd resign myself to doing cry-it-out bootcamp, it would be inconvenient. We'd be going out of town, she'd be kinda sick, breaking teeth, other reasons. Sleep bootcamp is not all that fun for parents either, initially. But it has rewards :)

So last night she was up 3 times. I wanted to let her CIO the second time, but John thought she sounded hungry and so he fed her. Plus he can't sleep through her screaming. Between 8:45pm and 7:20am she had 3.5 cups of milk. Crazy! So then I start second guessing the CIO. I'd sure hate for my baby to be awake because she's hungry. But maybe she's just using the bottle for a crutch? She should be able to make it through the night at this age. She has been able to since she was very young.

So today I made sure to offer her more food and milk during the day. I stuffed her as full as I could. Which isn't easy because she's either being very picky or very willful these days. Lunch involved a lot of tears and me yelling once, ashamedly.

But now I'm trying to remedy months of poor sleep while Sophia is fighting a cold. Another inconvenient time! But I'm determined to get us back on track, soon!

So educate yourself, go with your gut, and try not to agonize over every decision! There are too many of them to be made to major on the minors.

Here's to happy parenting and a full night's sleep!

Step away from the desk...

So last week I sat down at my little work area/desk, which is just a built-in to the right of our fireplace. A small space that managed to cause me a big headache.

At first my goal was just to balance the checkbook and update the budget. Never a very fun thing, but usually not too frustrating or painful.

Until I saw online that the auto parts we purchased so the mechanic could repair John's car, were like, twice or triple what I thought it would be. What I thought was simple rear brakes and a front right strut turned into both front struts and all four brakes. And then struts also have to have mounts and boots. Since John's car is older these are sold separately and are more expensive. A lot more expensive. Like total parts and labor was almost $1000 expensive. Womp womp.

Fortunately we got an unexpected check that very week that covered the repair bill short only $100. But- we had already spent that money in our minds- on new cell phones and house repairs/improvements. So although I am grateful that we only had to take a tiny bit from our "emergency" fund for the car repairs, it was bittersweet.

Then I decided to check with John's health insurance about our application to add me to the policy. To be clear, I'd called them 10 days prior to this when I'd gotten a letter stating our application was incomplete. I let them know the original application was sent in late December but that the first week in January I had sent a completely new application since I couldn't ever confirm with them they'd received the first one. I wanted to make sure they did the underwriting from the new application "Yes, I see the new application" they said. "No, we won't close your file" they said.

I knew it wasn't good when I called to check and heard "May I place you on hold while I investigate this further?". Long story short "it appears that underwriting has not been reviewing the new application, I'm going to have to forward this to a specialist, we try to call you back within 72 hours, but Monday is a holiday". Great. They did put a note in my file at my request that I am NOT happy and am trying to avoid making another whopping COBRA payment for February. That was Friday. No one has called. So that'll be on Thursday's to-do list.

Then I called my current health insurance to make sure they added Sophia for February. Apparently her pediatrician has been having trouble billing. They told me "due to a high call volume we are taking messages at this time and returning phone calls with 48 hours". I did manage to find out what her number would be on the policy if she had been added.

So yeah, at that point I just had to step away from the desk...

Fat, sick and nearly due

That's about how I feel these days. Especially work days. After work I have the energy of a slug.
Thankfully I only have 6 work days between now and my due date. Of course if I go past due (I'm told that's likely) I'll try and put in a few extra hours so I don't eat up my maternity leave. Maybe a few half days or something.

I'm ready for this baby to come. I feel so large, slow and awkward. And tired. Not like I need to take a nap tired, but like, I just want to sit down and not move tired. I have dirty floors right now and the bathrooms will need cleaning again before my due date. I wonder who's going to do it? Lol. I think if I just do one small task and then rest, I should be able to get it done. Especially on my two days off before Monday.

Yesterday I got off work early and so I took advantage of the time to grocery shop. Sam's, then WalMart, then a solid hour in the kitchen making dinner and repackaging meat for freezing. I was totally slap worn out after. I hope to not go grocery shopping again before she comes. We loaded up on meat at Sam's, so that we would have provisions til she comes and for a week or two after.

The big mistake is that I bought things to fill in our menu. The mistake with a menu is that it involves cooking. Which involves effort and motivation (and being on your feet of course), all of which I lack.
John is pitching in (or he'd starve!) by cooking. Tonight he even cleaned too. I offered to help with dinner cleanup but he refused.

I've taken to wearing tennis shoes to work. At least on the days I wear pants. My feet are either a little swollen or have just plain gotten bigger. My tennies were pressing on my big toes. And there's a lot less lace to tie than before. But just looking at my feet they don't look puffy. And I can't make indents in them with my thumb. But my hands and feet do just feel bigger and more awkward. It's uncomfortable putting on shoes, but only for a few seconds. I considered asking John for help this morning, but I was too worried it would be an ordeal to shove my shoes on and then my socks might bunch up wrong or something.

My belly button is still holding in. Not out. Lol. For a little while a small part of it was out, but I guess it was just the way she was laying.

I'm glad we got the maternity photos done- because the "miserable" stage has started. Although honestly I'm not miserable, just uncomfortable. I'm ready to have a normally functioning body back. I feel almost handicapped.

Anytime now Sophie, anytime!

Controlling your temper even when you're upset

So today we stopped into a Precision Tune to get the oil in John's car changed.
I've used them once before at another location in town, no problems. Cheap and pretty quick. The only place that is cheap enough that it's no longer profitable to do it yourself.

But today...
We sat in the full waiting room. And all was calm. Until.

A technician came in to tell a lady that her cabin air filter was dirty and needed replacing "Well, go ahead and do it." She said in an irritated "you're lying to me I just want to get out of here" voice.

Then they came back to tell her that all her old oil was out, but that her oil cap recommends full synthetic oil. She drives a Smart car. They told her the benefits the synthetic, but that unfortunately it costs about twice as much. She started throwing a fit, ranting that she wasn't going to pay $100 for an oil change. (I never heard them quote her a price). She told them she got her last oil change for $32. They let her know that was likely partial synthetic. She kept carrying on and then told them to just put her old oil and filter back in and let her go. They told her they'd put non-synthetic in if she wanted. She refused and they told her they'd put the old back in and have her out soon.

When they left she was like "ya'll sure you want your oil changed here?" I let her know I'd used this chain before with no problem and I'd never heard of a full synthetic oil change for $32. She told me the area she'd gotten it done in. Never heard of it. Anyway.

They rang her up and confirmed "you got the cabin filter right?" She was like "I don't know what a cabin filter is but I told them to put the old one back in." Of course I heard her tell them the change the cabin (air) filter. Anyway.

Then a lady and her toddler came in, already hostile "How much longer is it gonna be?" They told her the part should arrive in 15 minutes. She was like "That's the same $%* you told me 15 minutes ago, it don't take that long to get the part here, that auto place ain't that far away, I gotta go, this is ridiculous, I'm gonna need some kinda discount." The tech told her "we already gave you one on (such and such) remember?" She continued to complain and fly off the handle. He told her the part deliverer made a mistake and that's why it was taking longer. "Oh, so I gotta suffer because someone else, because ya'll made a mistake? This is  $%* ridiculous" and she stomped back out. She proceeded to continue fussing at them from outside in the pit area. She too told them to just put the old part back in because she had to go, she'd already been there an hour. She got on the phone and started complaining to a friend too.

Anyway, she came in to pay her bill and continued to fuss and rant. Threatening to not pay. Complaining to the cashier about what a crappy place it was, etc. As the cashier was going over her bill, she started saying she needed to see her old part, that it was put in, that they put her car back together, so her "$%& didn't fall apart going down the road." So the cashier went and got the technician, who told her that they put her old part back in as she directed. That if they hadn't gas would be leaking everywhere (apparently it was a fuel filter). They said the worse case scenario would be that they put a new one in and didn't charge her. Well, she kept insisting that they needed to put her car up on the rack and show her because she couldn't take their word for it. They went back out to the bay and she kept grumbling. She told the cashier she was going to call the police and then walked out.

Shortly after that our car was ready. No issues. I was kinda sad I didn't get to see it all go down. I told the cashier the police would be the best option because they'd politely put the lady in her place.

So I understand where the ladies were coming from- impatient, frustrated, feeling vulnerable. I too know what it feels like to wonder if you are being taken advantage of. But still, there was no need for that behavior. There's especially no need to act like that in front of your child. What a horrible example. They all could have expressed their feelings in a much more diplomatic way. I felt so sorry for the employees. They were having a rough day. I told John when we first walked in that the cashier seemed less than friendly and in a bad mood. Very much just putting in her time. But I realized by the end why she was probably so upset. Not that it makes the behavior acceptable.

So we had a good yet sad chuckle over the whole thing. And shook our heads.

When I'm in a mood

I ramble. I vent. I want to post things I shouldn't.

Lately I've been much less motivated than normal to be productive. That's really unfortunate since I have more personal time on my hands than before. There are just so many little things to be done. There always will be, I know. But I hate having my mind cluttered with my to-do's.

There's still a few hours worth of touch up painting. And several hours worth of installing quarter round and cleaning/sealing grout. And fixing our closet shelf. And getting a large rod and curtain panels to make a new set of "closet doors". And all the door handles need replacing. And none of our cabinets have knobs. And our microwave needs replacing. And one toilet paper holder needs to be moved and the holes patched, sanded and painted. And on it goes.

If you're not in the mood for whining, stop reading now. Cause I probably have more.

I also want to get a tan, but I don't want to sweat in the hot sun. It's a real problem. Especially since my husband hates the beach, so he's certainly no help in motivating me to get to the beach. But then I think about the cool water and it sounds relaxing. And I want to go. But instead my prego butt sits on the couch. Pasty.

Today my only productive thing has been to clean the kitchen and do laundry. But our bed is getting a complete stripping and washing, so that's good. Even the mattress cover and comforter are getting clean. And I'll take the time to peel off my pregnancy pillow cover and then wrestle it back on. Of course it will all be dirty again in a matter of days. I'm glad I got an inexpensive comforter, because it never stays clean long as long as the dogs are around.

Something I have enjoyed this week is watching some of the Olympics. Gymnastics is still my favorite, but swimming and diving have been enjoyable to watch too. The only problem is, they always break up the gymnastics into two parts, usually doing the finale at like 10 or later. And I never see it all because by that point I'm dozing off. Don't they know the little girls watching need to be in bed by then? And it would sure help out this prego too.

This week I worked all 5 days to cover vacay for a co-worker. I'm glad it's done, because a few of the days were quite mentally taxing. Physically though, I did ok. I even still made it to Zumba Wednesday night.

This week in Bradley class we started practicing relaxation techniques to use during a contraction. Your partner is supposed to run their hands over you to feel if there is any tension anywhere in your body during the contraction and remind you to let go and breathe deep. Let's just say it was hard for John to be serious about that. Our other classmates said they hope we tape our labor because it's going to be hilarious.

We are dog sitting for a few days, so we have 4 in the house. It's busy around here. I don't think I'd want 4 all the time. It's also hard because they are all used to a lot of attention. But for ours, it should be good practice for when they have to share with Sophia. They have been giving some pretty pitiful looks to me.

And I guess that's about enough brain dumping for now. If you made it through this post you must be really bored, or looking for commiseration. :)

A little bit of this and a little bit of that

So I've not posted much but baby stuff lately. And that's cause other than work, and continued domestic upkeep, there's not been too much going on in my life. But- here's a few non-baby highlights.

Last Thursday I got all three pairs of Crocs for $10. Since my feet are aching a lot more lately due to tile floors and baby, I had to succumb. The pink ones are just for around the house though. It took me about 10 thrift stores to finally find some in my size, but then one store had all three pairs!

I also tried the sock bun curls that I first saw on another blog. To be honest, they don't look nearly as tight and defined as the youtube video I watched, but it does give my ends some curl that falls out into waves in a couple hours. I actually really like the bun too. It's a comfortable yet different way to wear your hair up and out of the way, especially in this hot hot weather. I like big hair and I could never get a bun this big with my own natural hair. The sock adds lots of volume.

This was my second attempt. The third time I let my hair dry thoroughly and used a lot of hair spray before making the bun. The curls seemed to last a little longer.

A couple weeks ago my dad and a buddy of his came for a visit to watch the Blue Angels beach airshow. The weather was perfect. Not.

But since we spent about 12 hours at the beach that day, there was a lot of people watching to be had. Check this guy in his awesome hot pants. And yes, those are whitey tighties underneath. Which although ugly, I was thankful for.

Then this other bohemian looking surfer guy pulled up on his beach cruiser and took out two pouches about the size of two paperback novels and turned it into a hammock. Kinda jealous if I do say so myself.

And this is two grown men and one grown pregnant woman huddled under the beach umbrella as another "squall" came through. By the end of the day the umbrella was broken thanks to the wind. The upside was that the Blues did manage to get in a quick show, and although we were at the beach for 12 hours and I didn't put on a lick of sunscreen, I didn't get burnt. But I also didn't get the tan I was hoping for. :(

And can I take a moment to rant about annoying children at the beach? Since I was going to be at the beach forever, I decided to try and nap/relax a bit. I dug out a shallow trench and headrest so I could recline some. And to claim the space at my sides I had two camp chairs, one on each side of me, to make some personal space. There was about a foot between me and the chairs. Apparently a foot looks like just enough room for a rowdy 3 year old to run through. More than once. Because I was the path of least resistance between the water and his camp, about 20 feet behind me. Three year olds have no sense of beach propriety. And apparently his mother had little sense of discipline, because she was constantly begging and bartering with him to listen to her. In fact, one time she had to pick him up and drag him back, as he was flailing and screaming. And then laughing. Obviously he was in no real distress. And then I hear his mom say "Are you kicking me? and then laughing and tickling him. You better believe if my child is kicking me and throwing a tantrum I will not be laughing. I will be beating his behind.

So the first time or two he almost trampled me, I ignored it and tried to shoot his mom or whoever was with him some stink eye. And then once my sheet was sandy from wind and myself, I decided to get up, shake it out and move the chair closer to me. More like 6-8 inches away. This is no small feat for a prego to crawl in and out of a sand trench. No sooner had I flopped back down then that little turd ran by anyway. Kicking about a cup of sand onto me. And the lady with him (not his mom) says very calmly "sorry" and keeps on. Oh I was ticked. There was no polite and expected "Oh it's ok" from me. There was silence. And there was no reprimand to the hooligan, just a quick perfunctory apology from the adult.
Kids (and their parents) these days!

Well, I guess that's enough whining and complaining for now :) And since I've been sitting here for a couple minutes contemplating and can think of nothing else to say, I reckon it's better to just sign off.
Until next time...

Lost in translation so much frustration

Let me take a moment to share a fail of the US Postal Service (USPS). To be honest, I've overall always had good service from USPS. But over the last few weeks they have fallen out of favor with me.

You see, I ordered this shower curtain for our master bath. Of course I just could not wait to get it!!!! Right now all I have is a clear plastic liner. It was ruffled from top to bottom and so very Anthropologie-esque and was only $25!

I was notified by United Parcel Service (UPS) that my item shipped out on the 30th. Of course, I ordered it a couple days before and had it shipped to my current address, as we were not sure when we would close on the house. Well I found out that afternoon that we would close in a few days, so I put in a change of address.
Per UPS, my package was delivered to the local USPS office for delivery on the 3rd. This is where it all went wrong.

On the 4th, I received notification from UPS that USPS had an exception that the package was "undeliverable as addressed" and to contact sender for further assistance. But yet the name and address on all correspondence was correct. It said the local carrier could not deliver as addressed. Odd because we were getting other mail. So I asked USPS online for a redelivery and to please contact me. They did and I was told that since I put in a mail forward, the package had gone to Jacksonville to be sorted and redelivered as that is where "package forwarding" is done for my area. It took another 5 days for it to get to Jacksonville. Per the online updated it arrived back in my city (again!) on the 11th very early. And then I heard nothing. for 4 days. So I called USPS again. At first they tried to tell me the package was returned to the sender. I explained that I was told prior that it was in the forwarding system. They could not tell me anything more than the online status- that it arrived in the sort facility in my city 5 days ago.

I was told they would "look into it" and someone would call me back within 24 hours. Well, I gave them 25 and no call. So I called them. I was told again that my package was returned to the sender. I had to tell the entire story (a third time) about what I had been told and questioned why they could not locate and deliver a package (within the same city) for 6 stinking days!!!! The rep offered to "have them look into it and call me back in 24 hours". I was peeved and demanded a supervisor. The supervisor informed me that indeed they did look into it and their final determination was that the package was returned to the sender undeliverable as addressed. She even confirmed the package came to my city, went to Jacksonville, came back to my city and THEN went back to the sender. I was TICKED!!!! So the following day I called the sender about having a replacement sent (a full two weeks after it was supposed to have arrived) and they gladly obliged and told me this time my package would arrive UPS only. All was well and per UPS, my package is scheduled to arrive tomorrow.

But then... today I got a voicemail from the "consumer affairs" department at USPS. No details, they just asked me to call back. I honestly thought they were calling to apologize or get the details of the whole thing so they could prevent it in the future, or something. Well, I was not able to call them back til after work. By then I had a second missed call and voicemail from them. I skipped listening to the second and called them back. At two minutes until the end of their business day, I called back and they'd already left. I let them know I was calling during business hours and no one answered and to please leave me a detailed voicemail as I cannot make personal calls at work.

After I hung up, I listened to the second voicemail. Well let me tell you, it was detailed. They were letting me know that my package was available for pickup at my local post office. Didn't say which one or give a phone number. Just to talk to "so and so" at my local post office. But here's the real kicker- they told me there was a $7 and some change fee due on the package "since it had to be forwarded". Are you freaking serious?!?!?!?! I've called 4 times about this and been told wrong information twice and my package is 17 days late and you think I'm going to come get it and give YOU money?

So I left them another nice voicemail that I'd been told twice it was returned to the sender and they were already mailing a replacement and there was NO WAY I was coming to pay a fee or pickup that package and they could tell the "local post office" to send it back!!

Errrrrrrrrgh. Those kind of things frustrate me so much! And there's no real recourse, because it's the federal government.

Anyway, I would not suggest using the UPS to USPS service. They can't seem to get it straight.

Why are people so rude?

So I've been thinking for awhile about posting some thoughts and pondering arising from real life scenarios.
Today I'm covering- people not keeping their word. Specifically, the RSVP.

Does this card mean nothing?

Another wonderful insightful blog I follow did a great post on Millennium Manners. I gobble her posts up each Monday. I don't agree with it all, but do agree quite a bit.

Anyway, in her post she shares two stories, one about a child's birthday party where almost half the guest list just didn't show and the hosts had rented out an aquarium and had catered food and another where the author's table at a wedding was only half full because of no-shows.

If you've ever planned a wedding or any big party, you know that each person who comes is likely costing you a pretty penny and you've done lots of things- food, favors, name cards, seating arrangements, entertainment etc. just for them. And it's such an insult to have your planning spat upon.

Sure, there are valid reasons you may have to skip an engagement you committed to. But IMO, they are very few. Because when you say you are going to come, it's a matter of being a person of your word to actually be there. You family is sick, you got in a car wreck, ran out of gas, got called in to work, learned of a very important event for immediate family etc. Those are valid.

But too often the reason is:" It's no longer convenient for me to make time for your event, I decided it does not sound enjoyable, I found something better to do, or I just don't 'feel' like coming." So sad and so rude.

I've often been known to give a "maybe" when I truly don't know if I want to do something. It's much less hurtful to the hosts if you give this answer then saying you plan on it and then not coming. In fact, a lot of people know a "maybe" often means a "not likely" but is the kinder way to say it.

I think in the areas of weddings, showers and birthday parties people are much too quick to think it won't matter if they come. But it does. Accommodations have been made. The honored guest has been looking forward to your attendance. If a large number of people confirmed then the host expects a large number of guests. And these particular times in our lives are a good indicator of how big our support system really is. It's sad to learn that people you thought were friends are really just acquaintances. That you aren't important enough to them for them to take 3 hours out of their schedule to celebrate with you.

I recently had this experience on a much higher level when coordinating a party. Someone who had committed to helping provide food for the party did not follow through and did not call to inform me of the change. In fact, when they were contacted 15 minutes into the start of the party they did not answer their phone. Thirty minutes into the party they answered to let me know that they were still cooking!  A half hour later I was informed (an hour into the event) that they were not going to be able to come, but could drop off the food if needed. An hour into a two hour event! We were all more than satiated at this point. The worst part of all was that it hurt the honored guest. Especially when no reason was given besides "Something came up". For shame!

So I encourage you next time to receive an invitation to reply with veracity. Better to contact the host and tell them you can come even though you replied you couldn't than to bail on a commitment to come. Then your host will be pleasantly surprised rather than frustratingly disappointed. And for PETE's SAKE- turn the thing in! If it's an SASE, you have NO excuse! Pick one or the other, but don't just leave the host wondering and wasting 45 cents!

It's also a good time to put the shoe on the other foot and think about if you would like that person to attend your wedding/shower/party or if in fact they have done so in the past for you.

It's a matter of your word.

I almost went ghetto in the ghetto store

Funny thing happened to me last Friday night-

I stopped into Dollar Tree to pickup a few things. There's actually some stuff there that makes it worth going in; like cheap paper plates, cups and the really cute headband I got.

Anyway, they had a few large signs on their windows that said "Christmas 50% off". I doubted they would have anything left, but decided to look. Over against a wall on the bottom shelf were some pre-decorated gift boxes, packaged in red cardboard displays. At 50 cents each I figured "why not?" and picked three up. I chose a red, green and gold.

With all my items in hand I went to the cashier. She rang the boxes up last and I noticed that they rang up at regular price. I asked "Isn't the Christmas stuff half off?" She was very polite and called for the manager. The manager said "Oh, those aren't Christmas. We sell those year round. All the Christmas stuff is gone."

For proof that clearly she was wrong, I present a photo of one of the boxes:

That's right, this shiny red box with a green glitter lid is NOT for Christmas. This is in fact a color scheme that people choose for their gift concealment all year long. Yeah, right.

I was quite bewildered at her statement. But I said "Well then I don't want them then. Because those are clearly Christmas boxes." Then the manager told the cashier that since she would have to void more than 2 items she would have to re-ring the entire transaction. As I noticed a long line of people behind me giving angry stares of impatience (especially the man right behind me with only one item) and since as usual only one register was open even though there were 2 other employees in the store, I told her to just void two of them then and I would take one at regular price in order not to hold up the line. So now I'm the owner of the shiny all-season gift box above.

I still snicker a little thinking about it. I was self-controlled enough not to say "If there's no Christmas items left than maybe you need to take your sign down." Or "Are you blind?" And nice enough not to make them re-do the whole transaction. And nice enough not to question why when I buy 10 of the same item they can't just scan one and enter a quantity of 10 rather than scanning each one.

So next time you see a shiny red box with a green glitter lid- I want you to think "This would make a great container for my Mother's Day gift." :)

A conversation over the cubicle wall

This happened between a co-worker and I yesterday and I couldn't help but share!

Oh, and this would be one of those times when I do get a tad political :)

Co-worker:  That Susan Sarandon’s something huh? (Said randomly)

Me:  What do you mean? Has she done something lately?

Co-worker:  Oh, no, she’s just always doing stuff and speaking out. She’s got an article speaking out against Wall St. (Article found here)

Me:  Wall St? What did they do?

Co-worker:   Well, getting rich at the expense of the poor and their tactics and all that.

Me:  How is Wall St getting rich at the expense of the poor?

Co-worker:   Well, look at those bank bailouts.

Me:  The government gave the banks bailouts, not Wall St.

Co-worker:   Well, that’s our taxpayer money.

Me:  Well then she should be protesting government, not Wall St.

Co-worker:   She’s just always speaking out for the poor.

Me:  Last I heard, Susan Sarandon was not poor.

Co-worker:   Well I know, but she could be sitting up there in her ivory palace not saying anything (about the so-called great income disparity in this country).

Me:  Well if she feels so bad about it, she should give a big part of her money away.

Co-worker:  I bet she does.

Me:  *Chuckles and shakes head*

Because I know, for certain, that Susan Sarandon is not living anywhere close to the budget my family lives on, and even we are not poor. To us and most of society, we are also not rich. But we have food, shelter, and clothing and are able to pay all of our bills and save. Because we budget. Because we work. Just like Susan Sarandon. I don’t begrudge Susan any of her money, not one bit, nor do I feel she’s obligated to give any of it away.  But it does raise my ire that she would point at others and say they should. Do I believe in giving? Certainly. We give. But I don’t believe in thievery, in taking something that does not belong to you and giving it to another. As Dave said “People praise Robin Hood, but he was a thief!”.