Monday, August 29, 2011

The great baby debate

It's an internal debate though...

I know I've mentioned this before a dozen few times. But I've just been thinking about it again recently. Since hubby completed his "to do before baby" list. But I've not yet completed mine. And I know everything will never be "perfect" in order to have one, but I wonder how long you wait seeing if things will be a little more the way you want them before you dive in.
Of course I've already made a self-imposed limit to have the first one before 30, no matter what. So I figured with that to be on the safe side we should start trying at 28. But even then, nothing is guaranteed. I start wondering- what if we run into problems. What if it takes longer than I think to get preggo? Should we start now? But then I think about how hairy it would be to have a baby right now. We are in so much transition already.

Sometimes I wish it would just happen so that the decision is made for me. So I don't over-analyze it. Right now I just can't convince myself to even try. Because if you try and are successful right away, there's no un-doing that deed. Not that I would want to. I am sure if I were pregnant I would be excited and yet still a little scared as all women are. But since right now the decision is still based on logistics and logistically it doesn't make sense, here I sit. On birth control which is working very well.

Everyday at my job I see only children struggle to take care of their aging parents. I see elderly people who have no relatives at all to care for them. I even told the hubby the other day we need to have 3 or 4 just to hopefully increase our chances that in our old age our kids can help us out. Without it being too much of a burden on any single one of them. Now I know having lots of kids does not guarantee that they'll take care of you. I've also met people who have 8 children and no one to help them. But, I think it does help your chances. Especially if you are nice to them and make it easy for them to help you :)

Anyway, even if I spend the next eight months debating whether to go ahead and start trying, at least at the end of them the decision will be made. Since I've already made a plan to start trying then. That is if I don't chicken out... :)


  1. It's so weird you are posting this today because my husband is going for his consult today to get a vasectomy. I'm not convinced this is the right thing, but if we don't take the plunge and get it over with we'll end up with another baby (don't get me wrong that would be a blessing) but financially and logistically it just doesn't make sense. I guess the point is, you just have to do it. It'll never be the right time (for either - to have or permanently not to have). There will always be pros and cons no matter where you are at in life. If you want it and you feel comfortable to try at 28, then wait until then and have fun practicing in the meantime ;)

  2. Wow, a lot to think about and I remember feeling that way. Just know, there will never be a perfect time, but I can tell you guys would be great parents whenever it happens!

  3. you will never be completely ready! cooper was a total surprise, but looking back, it was amazing timing. this baby we tried for several months for and still felt like "whoa, what did we just do" when the test came back positive! if you want kids at all, then i think it doesn't matter when. everything just falls into place.


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